Development at 49 Months
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Activity 1
Age Appropriate Cognitive Development
Shows Understanding Of More/Less, Many/Few Between Two Groups
 I am starting to compare 2 number quantities. I can differentiate between more or less, many or few. Typically, I will use phrases such as "I want MORE/LESS", or "How MANY can I have?" Such comparisons are important milestones for my mathematical readiness. This is because I now know that the difference between 2 groups of the same items happens because of REAL quantity changes. Not just because the 2 groups LOOK like they are different. Watch me do this between 46 and 56 months (3 year 10 months and 4 year 8 months). |
Steps
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Play a simple "MORE" or "LESS" game with your child.
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Place 2 pieces of A4 size paper in front of the child. Place one directly in front of the child. Place the other just above the first piece.
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Lay 5 building blocks on one sheet of paper and 3 on the other, all in a single row.
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Ask the child which group has MORE or LESS building blocks.
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Repeat with different numbers of building blocks for comparison, e.g. have 6-2, 1-3, 5-4, etc.
Feedback
This task allows you to observe your child's ability to identify correctly which group has more objects and which group has fewer objects, which is an important skill to start him off on his mathematical skills. This ability to compare number values from 2 concrete groups of objects usually develops between 3 year 10 months and 4 year 8 months.
Give your child plenty of time for this and if you observe that he is having some difficulty, try to identify where his problem lies, e.g. your child may be unsure that each number corresponds to 1 quantity. He also may be confused by the large amounts he has to compare. Or he may be uncertain of the values of numbers.
Look at the suggested activities for ideas to help him to meaningfully acquire the understanding of "more" or "less".
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Play "More or less" with fingers on one hand. Create a game to be played by both of you. You and your child are to place one of your hands behind each of your backs. Say "Let's see who has MORE" or "Let's see who has LESS". Then show your fingers. Count and see who wins. Have fun playing this game.
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Play the "More or less" game with other objects in a not so obvious manner. E.g. instead of placing the groups of objects in a row, place the objects in a random order. This is to allow him to understand that he needs to count to compare the groups in any type of situation and order.
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 Use "more" or "less" in your everyday language, e.g. during dinner, you can ask whether your child wants "more" food, juice, etc.
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Meaningfully apply numbers to everyday life. E.g. prepare a shopping list of what and how many of particular items you plan to buy. Involve him in looking for and shopping for the items.
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If your child has difficulty with this skill, start by making the comparisons very obvious and the quantities small, e.g. compare 1 block versus 3 blocks. Once your child understands the game, he will naturally learn to compare larger amounts and less obvious differences. It's normal for children of this age to grasp quantities of not more than 4-5 in each group. So pitch this activity at a developmentally appropriate level. Aim always for success to make this activity fun.
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Focus on having your child understand that counting means associating a word number 1 to the quantity value of 1. Start counting and understanding 1-5 before moving on 6-10.
Some ideas to meaningfully teach that 1 number equals 1 quantity:
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Play finger songs games. For example, make up songs using the child's fingers (i.e. one little, two little, three little Indians). End the song with a tickle, and then get him to count using his fingers to get the tickle.
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Keep your egg cartons. Have him place 1 egg into 1 space in the egg carton.
Let him pack 1 roll of film into 1 film canister and display all the canisters in a row for him to count. Keep chocolate tray boxes. Have him keep 1 coin/block/etc. in each chocolate hole. -
Have ready a few pieces of cardboard cards. Clip a large clothes peg onto each card. Have him count after he finishes pegging 1 peg to 1 card.
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Encourage the association of the correct word for the right quantitative value, e.g. when your child has 4 friends come over to his house, let him count and understand that he need four cups of drinks to serve each one of them, 1 for each person. The understanding of one to one correspondence is important. Otherwise he will have difficulty comparing groups of quantities because he does not understand that each quantity represents 1 item. He will be able to know which has more or less when he is able to count.
Activity 2
Age Appropriate Social Development
Accepts Disappointing Situations
 I really treasure the moments when we do something interesting together. When you tell me that we are making a trip (e.g. swimming, zoo, shopping, park downstairs, etc), I will be very excited and will look forward to the hour or day when this happens. But when unforeseen circumstance happens and the trip has to be cancelled, I will naturally feel disappointed. Observe how I manage my disappointment. After the initial disappointment, I will soon learn to adapt to the change by finding or accepting another different course of action. I will do this between 49 and 55 months (4 year 1 month and 4 year 7 months). |
Steps
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Use a natural situation or engineer a disappointing situation. - E.g. rains when you plan to bring your child to the swimming pool or park. - your child falls sick on the day he is going to the zoo.
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Observe your child's response: a. Does he show disappointment? ; b. Does he try to find another solution that is positive? ; c. Does he accept your solution? ; d. Does he have difficulty in accepting the change?
Feedback 1
Your child is learning to adapt well to inevitable changes in his environment at this stage. It is normal for every child to feel disappointed when something he likes cannot happen. Yet it is also important for your child to learn how to manage his own feelings.
 Resistance to some changes is a normal part of growing up between 49 and 55 months. But children normally grow out of it. Furthermore, the insistence on sameness would also not predominate the most part of their lives, even then.
Look at the suggestions for some ideas to teach your child emotionally intelligent ways of coping with his feelings.
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Use each disappointment as a natural teaching opportunity for emotional adaptability.
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Ignore your child's emotional outbursts. Hold back and observe whether your child can develop his own positive solutions (e.g. asking you to bring him at a later date, etc).
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When your child is calm, then acknowledge the feelings created by the disappointment. Do not dismiss his feelings or tell him that he should not have such feelings. It is human and natural to feel emotions of sadness, disappointment and anger.
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Also talk to your child on how he can handle disappointments in a positive way. Illustrate your explanations with drawings helps make the points clear.
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Think about what is the thing that makes him feel sad. ("the problem")
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How does this makes him feel? ("his reactions")
- What does he do? ("present solutions")
- Does it help? ("evaluation of present solutions")
- What can he do? (e.g. brainstorm concrete solutions like to postpone the trip, wait and do something fun first, etc).
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Praise your child's efforts for being creative and accepting of change.
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Feedback 2
If you observe that your child has great difficulty to remain calm and is persistently crying, shouting and whining in disappointing situations, try to analyze the reasons for this.
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Is your child riding on your sympathetic attention?
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Then try to remain calm when your child cries/screams/throws tantrums. IGNORE your child's emotional outbursts. Ignoring means no eye contact, no words spoken, no touch. Just keep a straight calm face. This may be difficult for you because your child will react by intensifying an outburst. Try to hold yourself back. Your child is merely displaying a consistent behavioral response when someone tries to correct his negative behavior. i.e. a negative behavior will always get worse before it gets better when you change your response and reactions to them. When you are consistently implementing this firm strategy with him for 2 weeks, you will see a change in your child.
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Does your child not understand the change and what he could do?
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Empathize with the feelings ("I know you feel sad").
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State the reason matter-of-factly.
- Provide an alternative ("we will go after the rain stops", or "we can go shopping tomorrow after mummy comes back from work"
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Note: If you observe that your child insist on sameness for a large number of situations and he seems rigid in his ways, we do recommend that you seek the attention of your pediatrician or a child psychologist for assistance if necessary.
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