By Darlene
Zagata
We
often wonder why our children throw such awful tantrums when there
doesn't seem to be anything wrong with them. There can be
a variety of reasons for such behavior. Young children tire easily
even though they may appear quite the opposite. When children get
tired they get cranky. If you've been out running errands
or shopping with your child in tow, it's only natural for
the child to be tired and cranky.
If you must take your child with you, make the trips
shorter and more frequent. If the child has a regular naptime, try
to avoid outings around that time. For example, don't take
the child out an hour before naptime if you're going to be
gone a longer length of time because you know your child will be
tired.
Sometimes a temper tantrum will result when a child
wants something he or she can't have. We don't like
to tell our child no but we often do so out of necessity and to
protect them. When a child must be denied an object for reasons
of safety or otherwise, try to replace the object of attention with
something else that may be just as captivating.
Children may have tantrums when other children take
something from them. As parents are well aware many children have
difficulty grasping the concept of sharing. Children will also sometimes
throw a tantrum for attention. Child experts may disagree with the
idea that children will behave in an inappropriate way just to gain
attention but parents know that they do. If parents are busy or
preoccupied, what better way for a child to get Mom or Dad’s
attention?
 No
matter what the reason is for your child's tantrum, try not
to get upset or exasperated. It's not easy for a frustrated
parent to calm down an upset child. That's like throwing another
log on the fire. Take a deep breath and be patient. Hold and comfort
your child. Reassure him or her that it's okay to get angry
or to be upset. When you and your child are both calm, you can talk
about the tantrum, why it occurred and how to behave better next
time. Reassure your child that you love him and that you are not
angry with him. But also let your child know that his behavior is
unacceptable.
Children react the only way they know how, which
like adults in many cases, is from an emotional stance. Help the
child to understand that the emotion he is feeling is normal but
give him better alternatives rather than behaving in an unacceptable
manner. Temper tantrums are normal but if a child exhibits anger
issues as he gets older that only seem to intensify or the child
is unusually mean to siblings, pets or other children there could
be an underlying emotional problem that may require the help of
a child psychologist. But don't let temper tantrums get the
best of your temper. This too will pass.
Article written by Darlene
Zagata.
All opinions expressed are that of the writer.
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